Blogs

The not so nice truths about pregnancy - which of these affected you?

For some people, pregnancy is a breeze and you may actually have that ‘pregnancy glow’ for the nine months of carrying your baby but for me, even though I was lucky to have relatively smooth pregnancies and healthy babies, I definitely didn’t have that ‘pregnancy glow’ people talk about. So from talking to other mums and from my own personal experience, here are some truths about what to expect when you’re expecting.

1 - Morning sickness. Despite its name, it can actually happen any time of day or night. There are varying degrees of morning sickness, some feel a slight feeling of nauseousness whereas others are physically sick but try to feel comforted that it affects around 80% of women and no harm will be come to your baby.

2 - Strong sense of smell and taste. During your nine months of pregnancy, particularly in the first trimester, you can develop an oddly strong sense of smell and taste. Foods that you used to love will now become your dislikes. Even the thought of food can make you feel a bit nauseous.

3 - Feeding for two. I like to ignore what people say about it not being true but I for one will use the excuse to eat everything and anything I want and more. Your body is going to change completely so why not enjoy it and eat that slice of chocolate cake. It will do the baby some good!

4 - Baby brain. Even the most organised and intelligent women will have baby brain during pregnancy. Your brain does turn into mush and you easily forget about things you should have done or should be doing. You will also have conversations where you will forget what you are about to say mid-sentence and if you do remember, you will say the most ridiculous things because you really believe it is true (even if your non-pregnant self would disagree).

5 - Sleepness nights...and you thought sleepless nights begin when your baby is born. Unfortunately, as your bump grows, getting comfortable will become more difficult when sleeping. I have always loved sleeping on my front so sleep during pregnancy was always going to be more uncomfortable for me. You are then conscious of not sleeping on your back and to one side.

6 - Fuller hair. Yes the thick luscious gorgeous locks on your head is one of the big bonuses of being pregnant, but hair does not only grow on your head. You become a little bit hairier all over - I always remember the hair that grew around around my belly button.

7 - Waterworks. You can cry at everything. Those hormones will all come out during your nine months of pregnancy.

8 - Waterworks no. 2...and the other waterworks will involve frequent toilet breaks. As soon as you start to get comfortable in bed, you then need yet another wee.

9 - Constipation. When I finally managed to go I honestly thought I was giving birth! Enough said.

Discllaimer: This is an account of my personal experience from pregnancies. Please seek medical advice if you have any concerns with what you feel uncomfortable with.  

Alternative ways to kick start labour

Once you reach your 8-9 months of pregnancy, you have pretty much passed the ‘glowing’ stage of pregnancy and it’s no surprise that you will probably feel ready and want baby to arrive. The excitement of your new arrival, the planning and preparation over the last few months, you just want to meet your little bundle of joy. So when you reach the 40 week mark and there are no signs of baby arriving, you start to think about ways to help kick star labour and you are probably willing to try all the old wives tales. Alice and I consider ourselves lucky as all, except one at 40 weeks, of our children were early (between 36-38 weeks).

We have heard of these alternative ways to bring on labour so if you are at that point in pregnancy when you want your baby to come out, maybe these are worth a try! I always believe your baby will make an appearance when they are ready (whether late or early) but there’s no harm in giving these a try, even if it’s to take your mind off the waiting game.

Marathon walks - well not quite but go for long walks. This makes the baby’s head put pressure onto your cervix, potentially triggering labour. If anything, it’s always good to get exercise and we really believe that being on the move helps during labour.

Eating pineapple - this will stimulate your stomach and help may help your contractions to start. Pineapple also contain enzymes that are meant to soften your cervix therefore triggering labour.

Eat hot and spicy food - the hot spicy-ness in curries are meant to stimulate your stomach and are believed to bring on contractions. It is often recommended to eat hot curries.

Raspberry leaf tea - a type of herbal tea containing high content of vitamins, minerals and tannins. It is thought drinking raspberry leaf tea can help to strengthen the uterus wall and therefore potentially speeding up labour.

Nipple stimulation - massaging your nipples is believed to help trigger labour as it tricks your body into thinking that your baby is suckling, releasing the hormone oxytocin causing your uterus to contract.

Sex! - it is probably the last thing you want to do being 9 months pregnant but the hormone oxytocin is released during sex which potentially triggers labour.

Have these worked for you? What did you do to bring on your labour?

Probably a slight exaggeration but for most of my adult life, whether it be at uni, work, playing sport, having dinner, meeting friends for coffee or drinks or dancing into the early hours, I spent it out.  The place where I rented was less a home than somewhere to sleep and get ready to go somewhere.  I would often pack something in every evening and often have back to back engagements.  After we bought a home, in my first pregnancy, except when the first trimester simply wiped me out and I often found myself fallen asleep on the sofa at 8pm, I was still going out regularly. 

Then my life changed. Forever.  No longer could I stay out all day and night.  No longer the spontaneity.  No longer the freedom.  From the moment my eldest was born I was confined to my house for a month.  Except for medical appointments I did not leave my house.  My mum tried to restrict me to the confines of my room in the first week after birth but I did wander around the house albeit slowly.  It was the middle of winter, cold, dreary and dark by 4pm and I actually welcomed the ‘excuse’ to stay in with my baby.  I was not looking forward to go out for the first time for my little boy’s one month birthday celebration.  The drizzly rain didn’t help. I did it but was glad to get back indoors.

After my month’s confinement I took the baby out and about during the day, we slowly built up a social life with other mummies and babies but the evenings I was always at home or at my parents’.  Partly because my other half works ridiculously long and unsociable hours, my friends with kids also stayed at home, and my friends without kids didn’t want to do baby friendly things in the evenings - taking a baby to the bar is probably not high up on the ‘great parenting list’.  Pumping was a nightmare so it didn’t really encourage me to express.  We tried taking little one out for dinner a few times but he was so unsettled that it made dinner out more of a chore than staying in.  So except on a handful of times I stopped going out in the evenings unless it was a special occasion. 

Of course there were times when I would have loved to catch up with my friends baby free but on the whole I didn’t really pine to go out.  I didn’t envy my friends who could spontaneously pop to Paris for a weekend. I had time to sit down - on my own.  I could wash up undisturbed. I could have a shower in peace!.  I could sleep.  I was so tired that I slept shortly after the baby slept in the evenings. I can imagine if you’re one of the first in your circle of friends to have children how left out it could feel.  No one else understands that you can’t meet up like you used to and the main way to keep in touch is through whatsapp.  I was lucky enough that most of my friends had babies within a year of each other so we were all in the same boat.  We kept each other entertained with our baby stories,  we vented to each other and we supported each other.  I was lucky to have a great support network so I didn’t feel too lonely in the evenings when hubby was at work.

For mums who don’t have friends with kids there are so many groups that you can join to meet local mums. I found it so much easier to chat to someone with a child just because you immediately have something in common.  The eye contact. The acknowledge of ‘I know what you’re going through’.  All it takes is ‘how old is your baby’ and there you go. You can start a friendship. 

What I try to remember every time I feed my baby is that food is mostly for exploration and fun before the age of 1.  To allow them to try new tastes and textures. They get most of their nutrition from either breast or formula so don’t stress about how much they eat. So our tip on weaning is to let the kids have fun, experiment and enjoy food. Forcing children to eat will not make them like it anymore, infant, it may make feel eating is a chore rather than to enjoy.

Here are some tips from other parents on weaning:

“I carry a small, compact sharp pair of scissors to cut up Claudia’s food.”  Ammy, Melbourne

“Use an old shower curtain under the high chair to collect the mess. Washable too. And embrace mess.” Mimi, London

“The Chicco Pocket Snack chair is def a life saver in terms of having a clean tray every time we go out, it's space saving for home use/easy to clean or like us we leave it in the car for eating out and round people’s house, we took it to Hong Kong with us so baby can always sit at the table and eat with us, it can be used as a booster (without tray) or like a high chair.” Cindy, London

“Bring out a garlic press with you for meals for instant baby food ... it's a bit heavy but really worked for Isabelle.” Sofia, London